Orders
by moiraphoenix
Summary: AU set aboard Battlestar Galactica. Kara Thrace and a nugget-hopeful get rather close. Will she manage to get her wings? Rated M for sexually explicit scenes. Femslash - don't like, don't read. Story timeline does not fit perfectly with show. I don't own them, just borrowing them for a bit. Enjoy! Comments are welcome and greatly appreciated! Thanks for reading!
1. Chapter 1

'Kara Thrace was nothing like I expected. Everyone had tried to warn me about how cruel and unfeeling she was, told me how much she drank, and how she was the "best damn pilot we've got." I expected her to act like any pilot jock, but even that expectation she exceeded. Kara "Starbuck" Thrace was a legend. The first time I "met" her was in a corridor on Galactica. I say "met" because she happened to be running by and was addressed by the Admiral. Her face glistened, her hair sticking to her neck and forehead. After a brief greeting, she continued her jog down the corridor. The Admiral watched her go, slightly shaking his head and smiling. It was rumored that the Admiral considered Starbuck a daughter.

When I was first assigned to Galactica, I thought it could be a fun challenge. I got the challenge part right. I was as part of the flight crew and would eventually be trained as a pilot. I was stationed under Galen Tyrol, who by reputation was the best mechanic Galactica had ever seen. He had a temper though so I was told to watch what I said in front of him. I tried to learn everything I could from him, from his unconventional thinking, to his cool demeanor around just returned "hotheaded" pilots. He was a great mentor, but I really wanted to fly too.

The first time I slept with Kara was hard and fast. I'd never slept with another woman before, only fantasized about it. Many people thought I did it so she'd teach me to fly. I did it because we were drunk and she wanted a quick frak. I had dressed quickly and quietly as I heard her sigh and turn over, her back to me. I left disgraced. I hope she enjoyed it more than I did, and I hoped there would be a next time when she threw me out of her rack that night.

There was a next time. We weren't as drunk, but she still wanted a quick frak. I was mildly delighted that she asked me when there were a number of people in the rec room to choose from, but she chose me anyway. She walked past the table I was at as she was leaving and, hardly looking at me, asked me to come to her quarters. She told me to leave five minutes later, and then left. When I turned up, there was no one else there. I cleared my throat, unsure of the proper protocol for this event. "Sir?" I asked the silent and apparently deserted room. "Come here" was the reply. Even though I couldn't see her, I walked over to Starbuck's rack and there she was, in her trunks. She was smoking a cigar and smelled faintly of ambrosia. She appeared to be deep in thought. "Lock the hatch" she instructed. I did so. Walking back to her, she instructed me to neatly undress myself and come up to her. I folded my clothes as I took them off and climbed up to her rack. She didn't make room for me so I stood on the ladder waiting for further instructions. "Get a move on Cadet" she had told me lightly patting the space closest to the wall. To get there, I realized I would have to carefully crawl over her. Perhaps this was her intention. Gingerly I stepped off the ladder and began to crawl into her rack. I had one hand and foot balancing on one side of her as I carefully brought my other hand and foot to her other side. In doing so, I bumped my head on the top of her rack and almost fell on top of her. "Watch yourself Cadet" she mused. I was now laying on her other side, completely nude and totally unsure what to do with myself. She sighed audibly and threw her cigar across the room. I tried to stretch out as well as I could, but the best I could manage was lying on my back with my arms at my sides. I stared at the top of the bunk hoping she would do something soon. I wished I had gotten under the blanket.

She slowly turned to her side, glancing at my face, then giving my body a once over. "You'll do" I heard her mutter, her eyes lingering on my breasts. "Sir?" I asked. "Listen to me Cadet, here's how this is going to work. Even though the hatch is locked, we may be disturbed. If this happens you're not allowed to leave. No one is supposed to know you're here, so you'll keep your trap shut and spend the night in this rack and when everyone leaves for their duty shifts tomorrow you can go. Got that?" I nodded. "_Do_ _you understand Cadet_?" she asked exasperatedly. "Yes sir," I said hastily. Spending the night in Starbuck's rack, with Starbuck? This would be different. "You must also understand that I am always in control. You _will_ do as you're told, Cadet, nothing more or less. Understood?"  
"Yes sir."

"Good well let's begin." I saw her eyes flick to my breasts again, my nipples hardening under her glance. She smiled, mysteriously. I felt embarrassed but excited at the same time. In her tanks and shorts she looked more womanly, more attractive, than in her flight suit. I hadn't gotten a chance to study her, let alone look at her, the last time. She looked bored. "Come on Cadet, do something." She suddenly grabbed my waist and pulled me closely to her. She smiled, and I had no idea what to do. Her fingers grazed my back, scratching slightly, so I tried to do the same. My fingers began to travel under her tanks up her back until she stiffened. Her skin was surprisingly smooth under my fingers. "No Cadet, remember what you agreed to? You're to do as you're told, and I did not tell you to do that." So I was to be her play thing. I could deal with this for now, but if there was a next time it would be different.

She continued to run her fingers up and down my back as I lay on my side with my arm over her hip. I was itching to do something, but I did as I was told and lay quietly, beginning to fall asleep. She moved her hand to my breast and squeezed it slightly, pinching my nipple till it hardened. She continued to roll it between her fingers, a smirk forming on her lips. Abruptly she stopped and watched me as I slowly opened my eyes and looked into her face. She knew I wanted her to continue. If I was to be her play thing, I might as well enjoy it. She pinched my nipple again, causing me to gasp, and her smirk broadened into a smile. "What did I tell you about being quiet?" She pinched my nipple harder and I whimpered, unintentionally. Her eyes narrowed as she continued her vice-grip on my nipple. I said nothing, lowering my eyes. Her hand moved down my abdomen, and I longed for her to keep touching me. Her hand continued over my stomach and down my leg to my knee. Hooking her fingers under my knee she said, "Bend your knee Cadet." I did so, giving her full access to my body. Her smirk widened further. I must have looked shocked or scared. "Remember Cadet," she spoke softly, moving closer to whisper in my ear, "I can do anything I want because I outrank you." Her breath was hot against my face. "You'll do as your told too, not just because you agreed to it, but because if you don't" I gasped again as she pressed her fingers against my clit, "I'll see to it that you're never allowed on the flight deck again. Got that?" "Yes sir" I said breathlessly almost moaning in sheer delight from her touch. She lightly circled my clit.

As her fingers moved, my hips began to stir in a similar motion. "Lay still Cadet." I looked at her in disbelief. How was I to keep still when this woman was rubbing my clit? I took a deep breath and tried to keep still as she continued with her thumb. I felt her fingers graze over my center, spreading the lips there. I was wet. I felt one finger gently enter me. I suppressed a gasp. I was surprised, expecting her to take me more roughly. Next she thrust two fingers, a little less gently. The walls of my center contracted around her fingers. "That's it Cadet. You can enjoy this quietly." I breathed deeply, the smell of my sex filling her rack. "Harder," I pleaded. "Harder? Am I mistaken or did I just hear _you_ order _me_ to do something? That's not how this works, Cadet. You do as I say, not the other way around," but her fingers began to thrust faster and harder.

I felt my climax building. My breath came faster. "Good Cadet." Her voice was husky in my ear. "I want you to come for me Cadet. I want you to come right now." I was close, but not that close. Her fingers thrust faster and rubbed harder. Finally my abdominals contracted and I half sat up as my legs shook uncontrollably. As I lay back down my breathing unevenly she almost soothed, "That's it Cadet."

When I'd settled back into the bed, she removed her fingers and began to wipe them on the sheets. I took her hand and brought her fingers to my mouth, expecting her to like this, as I sucked my juices from her callused fingers. She smiled, pushing them deeper into my mouth making me gag a little. "Hmm, so you can be trained." Trained? "You're a free spirit Cadet. You need to rein that in around here – there's only enough room for one hot-shot pilot and that's me." "Uh, yes sir" I replied. "I can teach you, Cadet, but you have to put the work in. You have to promise me that you'll work and that you'll do as you're told. Can you do that?" "Yes sir. I'll work hard and I'll be good. I promise." She smiled at me, gently stroking my cheek. I turned my head and kissed the palm of her hand. She slapped me. "I did not tell you to do that Cadet. I thought you said you were going to do as you were told?"

"Yes sir, but I – I thought"

"You don't think, Cadet, you do as you're told." My cheek stung where she'd struck me but I resolved to do anything she told me, within reason. "Turn over." I did so, my back facing her. I felt her move closer, her fully clothed body curling behind my naked self. She wrapped her arm around my waist, pinning me to her. I lay there stiffly waiting for further instruction or for her to fall asleep. A few minutes later she told me to get out. I had expected this and slowly untangled myself from her. As I crawled over her I felt her fingers graze my thigh, but I kept moving, following orders. I dressed quickly and sloppily. To my horror, as I reached the hatch I heard someone trying to open it from the other side. "Clean up your act Cadet" I heard her say, "or else this will all be a figment of your imagination." "Yes sir" I mumbled trying to leave quickly before this person broke through the door. As I opened it, much to my embarrassment, it was Captain Adama. "Sir! Uh, Captain," I made a lousy attempt at a salute. "Cadet" he acknowledged me with a nod, pushing past me into the senior officer's quarters. As the hatch was closing I heard him inquire about my presence. Starbuck's reply was simply "she was here for my amusement." I bowed my head as the hatch shut and walked quickly to my own rack. Next time would be different.


	2. Chapter 2

My first time observing flight was in a raptor. I got to suit up like the Viper pilots, but they wouldn't let me near anything. I was observing. I was told the next time I'd get to fly, and I couldn't contain my excitement.

We sat in the briefing room, me and the six others who had passed the written exam. We were nervous – you could feel it in the air and hear it in the jittery talk. Starbuck walked in, and in my attempt to please her, I jumped to my feet and shouted "Officer on deck!" She paused, turning slightly to see who had announced her. I stood, frozen at attention while a few remaining stragglers rose slowly to their feet. I could feel her eyes boring into me, but I forced myself to stare straight ahead – she knew it was me.

"Good afternoon," she paused, "nuggets." She waited. "The correct response is 'Good afternoon Lieutenant,' nuggets, or has it been that long since Basic Training that you've all forgotten how to address a superior officer?" She looked at each of us; my face burned. "So," she paced across the small raised platform at the front of the room, "we'll try this again. Good afternoon nuggets."  
"Good afternoon sir" or "good afternoon Lieutenant" was the mumbled response. I had every intention of speaking loud and clearly, but I quickly lost confidence with the others. Her eyes blazed and I felt I'd let her down. "Let's try this one more time. I say 'good afternoon' then you respond. This is not rocket science people this is greeting protocol! Now, good afternoon Cadets."

"Good afternoon sir!" Our voices echoed in the room. "Better. I'm Lieutenant Thrace, my call-sign is Starbuck, but for now you may call me God. I am what stands between you as whole and solid as you are now from being something the knuckle-draggers hose out of the cockpit. You will do what I tell you, when I tell you, not just because it's a good idea, but because it will keep you from being a puddle in your cockpit."

She continued to talk about the Viper itself and its specifications, but I stopped listening. I couldn't help it. She moved her hands expressively as she spoke and it was her hands that I followed. Those fingers had fraked me a few nights before, making me see sparks. Those fingers, warm and rough, had held me after my climax, gently rubbing the skin between my breasts while I rested. Granted she had kicked me out moments later to a surprised Captain Adama, but they still fascinated me. I watched her hands as they slammed onto the podium. I looked up to find her glaring at me. "Cadet Davis, are you with us?"

"Yes sir!" I tried to muster some confidence in my response.

"Then, pray tell, what have I been talking about?" I racked my brain trying to figure out what she'd said. "Viper specs?" I volunteered.  
"What about them Cadet?" She sounded bored. I tried to look at the notes on my neighbor's desk, but he quickly covered them when he realized what I was doing. "Well?"

"I don't know, sir," I replied deflating like a balloon.

"Cadet, may I remind you that you were part of a very small group that passed the written exam and showed the _cahones_ and flair necessary to become a pilot." She stepped off the platform, and walked towards me. "On your feet Cadet!" I scrambled to my feet, clasping my now sweaty palms behind my back. "Now I see I was wrong about you." She leaned closer to me and I glanced sideways at her. She looked so smug, she almost leered. "I expect my nuggets to behave as such, but I will not accept disobedience or cheek!" Quietly she said, "I thought you told me you'd do anything it took to be a pilot, and yet you've failed on your very first day." My face burned and I looked down. It would have been better if she'd just yelled at me. "Dismissed Cadet." Head still down, my eyes began to sting with the onset of tears. Forcing myself not to cry here, I gathered my few items and left the briefing room, feeling everyone's eyes staring at my back. As I reached the hatch, Lieutenant Thrace continued her lecture. I opened and closed the hatch as quietly as I could. I'd failed my first lesson as a pilot and I'd failed Lieutenant Thrace. The latter stung more.

I went back to work in the hanger deck, filing papers, when I heard my name called over the wireless. "Cadet Davis please report to the briefing room. Cadet Davis to the briefing room." A few people looked at me as I left, but most people paid me no heed as I walked out. As I approached the room that I'd been kicked out of hours before, I noticed that the hatch was open. I slowed, gathering myself for whatever lay inside the room. Shoulders back and head held high I gently pushed the hatch open. "Close the hatch" I heard Lieutenant Thrace say before I saw her. I did. Her voice echoing in the room sent shivers up my spine. "Lock it." Mystified, I did so without hesitation. I walked into the room finding Lt. Thrace sitting in the first row reading a file.

"Stand before me Cadet." I did so, hands clasped behind my back, eyes forward. I glanced at the file she was reading – it was mine. She sat back in the chair and looked up at me. She smirked; she'd seen me look at the file. "It says here you were an average student, Cadet. Why was that? Didn't you think to work harder?" Harder? I'd worked my ass off to get the grades I did. Okay maybe I could have pulled a few more all-nighters, but I'd done my best. As if reading my mind she said, "Your best wasn't good enough, Cadet. Not to be part of my Viper squad anyway, and yet, by some miracle, you passed the written exam." She stood up. Only a few inches taller, she towered over me, looking me in the eye, though I kept staring at that imaginary point somewhere above her eyebrows. "Did you cheat Cadet? Look off your neighbor's paper like I saw you try to do today? Thought your buddies might help you?" '_We're not buddies_' I thought about saying but then realized how dumb that sounded. "I didn't cheat, sir," but I knew I'd taken too long to answer. Her smirk widened. "Then how'd you pass that, wanting this so badly, and yet fail today's lesson?" I looked down, "I wasn't paying attention," I said, unable to admit the real thing that had caught my eye. "I noticed, though your little display when I walked in was appreciated all be it a clear move to suck up. Your classmates noticed too – probably why Johnson was so reluctant to let you look at his notes." She smiled, actually smiled at me and said, "Just make sure you pay attention to everything next time."

"Next time? Sir?"

"Yes Cadet, next time" she sounded annoyed. "I'm giving you a second chance. Don't frak up this time or you'll find yourself farther down in the pecking order than you are now – yes that's possible."

"Thank you sir!" I tried to keep my voice level, but I was delighted that there might still be a place for me among the elite pilots. My elation must have shown because she said, "Don't expect any special treatment from me, just because I've fraked you. That frak meant nothing to me, but it did prove that you're good at taking orders. Perhaps you'd like to meet me later this evening to show me what a good student you can be?" While I was crushed that the frak meant nothing to her, even though I already knew that, here was my chance to make everything up to her. I had promised to be good and this was my last chance to do so.

"Yes sir, I'll be there. Where – "

"I'll find you. Dismissed." I saluted and quickly walked towards the hatch. When I tried to open it, I found it was stuck and I panicked. "It's locked, Cadet. Remember?" Shit, it was indeed locked because I had locked it. Dammit what a fool I looked, just as I was patching things up. I unlocked the hatch and heard Lt. Thrace mutter "I've got a lot of work ahead of me." I leaned against the just closed hatch and breathed, possibly for the first time since I was summoned to the briefing room. She said she'd find me. I couldn't wait.


	3. Chapter 3

I decided to shower later that evening, figuring I'd have better access to the bigger showers. I was right – everyone was either on duty or asleep. For once I was able to take my time, soaping my hair, and even getting to shave my legs – what a luxury. Who would have thought, eh? I was rinsing my hair when I heard the bathroom door open. There were plenty of other stalls so I didn't mind. Then someone knocked on the door to my shower stall. "It's occupied," I called in response. I pushed my head back under the water to rinse the soap out. When I resurfaced, Lieutenant Thrace was standing in front of me. I made a feeble attempt to cover myself. "Sir? What?" I was irritated by her lack of concern for the sanctity of the shower. It's not like I hadn't been naked in front of her before, but somehow being in the shower was different. "I told you I'd find you, Cadet." She smiled, but her eyes were hungry, predatory. She stepped toward me and I instinctively moved back, my heels hitting the wall under the shower head. I was trapped and she knew it, her smile turned into a sneer. "Stand at attention Cadet." I did so, feet shoulder width apart, hands at my sides. This was all a game. "There's more than one way to skin a cat, Cadet," She told me.

"I don't understand, sir."

"How's this: there's more than one way to make someone do something – torture, incentive, gifts, pleasure –" she let the last word hang in the air. "Hmm?" I was dumbstruck, frozen in space and time. Her 'more than one way to skin a cat' spiel was more along the lines of using rank and pressure (in their many forms) to force a result. Try as I might I wanted to resist whatever she'd want me to do, but I knew I'd fail. The water was splashing down my face, slightly blurring my vision. "Eyes open Cadet." I tried to comply but couldn't, the stream of water was too strong, causing me to blink frequently. I felt her press against my throat with her forearm before I saw her, forcing me back against the wall. I was trapped but at least my face was mostly out from under the spray. She pressed a little harder and I stood on the balls of my feet to keep her from crushing my windpipe. "Sir?" I choked out. "You promised you'd be good Cadet." She kept pressing her arm against my throat. "Turn around." I did so, not knowing much of what was going on, other than once again, I was naked and she wasn't. I turned and she pushed my body into the wall again, my cheek pressed against the cold stone wall. "Grab the shower head." I reached up and held it. "Don't move." I wouldn't have dreamed of it; the tone of her voice was enough to stop me dead in my tracks. I didn't think I could flee if I'd wanted to.

I felt her hands run down my back, nails scratching slightly as she went. It felt good for a while. Then she ran the same path with her fingers, pressing harder this time. Twice more she did this till I was sure there were bright red lines running down the back. At least she hadn't broken the skin. "Turn off the shower." I took one of my hands down from the shower head and turned off the water. The bathroom was quiet except for my breathing and the dripping of the water from the shower head. I heard the crack of skin-on-skin contact and then felt the sting on my ass. She'd hit me. Starbuck liked to hit it seemed. Again she smacked me and I cried out, not expecting it. She hit me again, harder. "Keep your trap shut Cadet." I tried, I really did, but it hurt! She grabbed a fistful of my wet hair and pulled me backwards. I slipped, falling and catching myself with my hands; my palms stung from the impact of the fall. She grabbed me under my armpits and hauled me out of the shower. She sat on one of the benches and leaned me over her knees. Feeling her knees digging into my chest I knew what was happening and braced for it. She spanked me, like a child who'd misbehaved. Her hand rubbed over my ass between my legs, gently running the length of my sex and I was suddenly aroused. Still wet from the shower she gently thrust two fingers into me, slowly fingering me. I moaned quietly. "Cadet…" she warned. "Sorry sir" I muttered. It felt good.

"Get up," she ordered. I sat back on my heels waiting for further instructions. "I told you to get up Cadet. Did all that water go to your brain? Get dressed." I did quickly having no idea what else was in store for me.

We went back to her quarters. She closed the hatch, not locking it which worried me a little. "Sit." I pulled a chair out from the table in the center of the room and sat down now very confused. She walked around the table, leaning over it, looking at me expectantly. "We talked about this last time, Cadet. You're a free spirit, a little wild. You can't even follow orders when I'm fraking you! You're not ready to be one of _my_ pilots – not just because you're too green, but because you're not a team player."

"I'm not?" I asked before I could even think to ask for permission to speak freely. She gave me a look that said 'I told you so,' and I kicked myself for not keeping my mouth shut. "Sorry, sir" I said, bowing my head.

"Cadet," she sighed, "in order to be a pilot you have to be smart, quick, focused and a little bit cocky. You've certainly got the quick and cocky bit down. What I'm not sure of is whether you're smart enough to know when to keep your mouth shut and to play well with others, or if you're focused enough to learn how not to get yourself or your squadron killed out there." She jerked her thumb towards the outside of the ship, indicating the other new pilots who were learning flight patterns. I was hurt and ashamed that I wasn't out there with them. "Give me your eyes, Cadet." I didn't hear her. My dreams of becoming a pilot were crashing around me. _"Now what" _I thought,_ "What do I do if I can't become a pilot?"_

"What did you say?"

"Nothing," at least I didn't think I'd said anything.

"'Nothing' what?"

"I didn't say anything sir."

"That's better. Cadet if I have to remind you of simple protocol, how am I supposed to teach you to be a pilot?" She was flustered, pacing the room like a caged animal.

"I don't know sir." I truly felt defeated. Was this her way of telling me that I hadn't made the cut? I watched my hands, loosely folded in my lap, and crossed and uncrossed my ankles, and my eyes blurred from staring at the same spot on the ground. The silence in the room was heavy. I don't know how long we were quiet or when Starbuck stopped pacing, but I suddenly noticed a third hand laying gently on top of mine. I blinked, and my eyes blurred again, and I realized I was crying. Tears steadily streamed down my face, one landing on that hand that was now stroking the back of mine. Through the tears I realized Starbuck was kneeling in front of me, looking up at me with concern. She gently reached out with her other hand and wiped away some of the tears from my face, which only made me cry harder. I was embarrassed to be in such a state in front of my superior officer. "Shh," she soothed. I pulled my knees to my chest, burying my head in them like a child, willing this emotional outburst to stop. I wanted to disappear.

I felt a hand stroke the top of my head and I heard a locker open. The locker slammed shut. "Here," she said, "you need this." She thrust a flask into my hand. I looked at it, at my hand holding it, then at Starbuck who was watching me with a mixture of concern and impatience. I knew she didn't want to deal with some cadet in her spare time, let alone one who couldn't control her emotions. Viper pilots were the guardians of whatever ship they were on. They didn't have the liberty to think, they just did what they had to do, what they were told. If you over-thought the situation, you'd be killed. Pilots worked on instinct. Currently my instinct was to crawl into a hole and disappear. Instead I took the flask, raised it towards Starbuck and took a long drink. It was awful, burned all the way down. I thought it might set fire to my insides so I handed it back to her, and, after taking a swig herself, she put it back in her locker. Before she closed it, I noticed a photo stuck in the door of Lieutenant Thrace embracing a man. There was another man in the photo whom I recognized as Captain Adama. So perhaps the rumors about the Lieutenant and the Adamas had some truth to them.

I sniffled, hating the feelings of wet and helplessness crying brought on. "Now then, Cadet, how are we doing?"  
"Alright I guess, sir" I felt defeated, dejected, and overall miserable. Losing one's cool in front of an officer was one thing, but crying I felt sure violated some trust or distance issues. Or maybe it strengthened a bond because it showed you at your weakest. Maybe that was wishful thinking, but there was only one way to go – forward. We can't go back in time. "I'm sorry, Lieutenant Thrace."

"What for?"

"For breaking down, for being a weak link in the chain, for forgetting protocol, not paying attention during the briefing, and for generally being a disgrace to the fleet and other nuggets."  
"Who do you think I am?" She asked, a slight grin forming on her face. "Miss Manners? The ship's Viper pilot poster child? Really cadet, who do you think I am?" She shook her head, smiling to herself. "Come on kid, let's go." She grabbed me under my arm, yanking me to my feet. "Whaa?" She kicked the chair I'd been sitting in under the table. "Here," she threw some clothes at me. "Change, now." I looked at the tanks and shorts she threw at me, and then I looked at her. "Put them on Cadet!" I started to undress, not having any idea what was going on. "What are you all prim, proper and modest now?" She grinned, wickedly, dressed down to her underwear. "It's not like I haven't seen it before." She was right about that and cackled as I continued to undress. I noted the faint smell of Starbuck on the clothes – fleet issued soap, lavender shampoo she told me she'd taken from Colonial One on her last visit, the wood and tobacco smell of her cigars and sweat. Not the cleanest clothes I'd ever worn, but who cares. I wondered if anyone else would realize I was wearing Starbuck's clothes. She was lacing up a pair of sneakers – I didn't have sneakers and from the outfit, it looked like we were going for a run.

"Sir?"

"What, you never ran in your boots during basic?"  
"Yes sir, but – "

"Then what are you worried about?" She smirked and opened the hatch. I stood there feeling ridiculous in her shorts and tanks and my boots, but what else was there to do? It's not that I ever cared about fashion, but I knew how people talked. I started to walk to the hatch in a daze and nearly bumped into her. She hadn't moved "Up straight, Cadet" she barked, and I felt like I was back in basic training. "Shoulders down and back," she insisted. "Jump," she said quirking an eyebrow.

"How high sir?" I found myself asking; my answer surprised her. She smirked and said, "Follow me" as she ran out of the hatch.


	4. Chapter 4

I stood there feeling ridiculous in her shorts and tanks and my boots, but what else was there to do? It's not that I ever cared about fashion, but I knew how people talked. I started to walk to the hatch in a daze and nearly bumped into her. She hadn't moved "Up straight, Cadet" she barked, and I felt like I was back in basic training. "Shoulders down and back," she insisted. "Jump," she said quirking an eyebrow.

"How high sir?" I found myself asking; my answer surprised her. She smirked and said, "Follow me" as she ran out of the hatch. I ran after her, clumsy boots smacking the floor. I tried to keep up with her light springy steps, but it had indeed been a long time since basic.

My breathing became harder and faster, and I felt the beginnings of muscle cramps in my legs. We rounded a corner, then another and another. Each time I fell one step farther behind her. "Keep up, Cadet" I heard her call, now half a corridor ahead. Then I lost sight of her altogether. I tried to sprint to catch up, head bowed, arms pumping. Suddenly I was tumbling down the corridor, rolling, finally coming to a stop in a heap near some cargo bins. Still panting heavily I lay there, curling into a ball thinking this day couldn't get any worse and knowing that I should get up. I didn't want too, but I knew I should. My legs began to ache and there was a throbbing in my shoulder where the bare skin had scraped the floor. I wasn't in any great deal of pain, but my pride was further bruised by people walking past, some giggling and others openly laughing at my predicament. I saw two booted feet stop in front of my face – couldn't be Starbuck, who – oh shit. I looked up to find Commander Adama staring down at me, a mixture of concern and agitation on his face. "Are you hurt Cadet?" I stared up at him willing my numb brain into action, my legs to spring my body up into attention, to salute the Commander, but nothing happened. I stayed curled up on the floor, simply staring at him. "Are you alright?" he asked again. _Think stupid think! Answer him!_ I yelled at myself. "I, I'm, uh, fine, uh sir" I blinked trying to remember how to stand up. Maybe I'd hit my head. The Commander reached down to me, extending his hand. I watched my hand slowly reach out and grab his, and he gently pulled me to my feet. I stood, swaying slightly on my sore and rubbery legs. I felt hands on my arms steady me from behind. "What happened Cadet?" I tried to focus on Adama's face, but couldn't from both shame and nausea. "Cadet?" The last thing I remember was the Commander staring wide eyed at me, and the warmth of the body that caught me as I blacked out.

I woke up feeling groggy. My eyelids stuck together and my eyes felt dry. There was a stale taste in my mouth as if I had vomited but I couldn't remember doing so. I blinked, noticing the white circle above me. It was a light fixture and thankfully was off. "Where – " my voice croaked and I realized I was alone. I propped myself up on my elbows and looked around. That's when I saw the cast with my ankle in it. A wave of pain so intense washed over me and I felt I might vomit – again. Again? Pieces were starting to come back to me: Starbuck, her alcohol, the gym uniform that I was still wearing, running, tripping – tripping? I didn't remember that – Commander Adama… While I hadn't realized before, I now felt certain someone or something tripped me. I remembered my boot – those damn boots! – colliding with something, twisting and that sickening crack. The curtains next to the bed were thrown back and Starbuck walked in, closely followed by Doc Cottle. "She needs rest Lieutenant! Why can't you understand that?"

"She's in pain, Doc, can't you give her more meds?" Her words were harsh.

"Please," I croaked out, looking from Starbuck to Cottle, "it hurts."  
"I'm sorry, but I can't give you anything else. You've had plenty." He turned and walked out. I tried to take a deep breath, then another and another. If I focused on my breathing, I didn't feel my ankle as much. The waves of pain retreated to a sharp throb that was just tolerable.

"I'd ask you how you were doing, but the grayish tinge to your face says a lot." I looked at her – her face was slightly flushed from her shouting match with Cottle, eyes full of concern. She gently took my hand. "Here," she said looking over her shoulder and thrusting her flask into my hand. I took a sip, and as I handed it back, she held up her hand and told me to bring it back when it was empty. I shook it gently – there were a few gulps left. I took another sip feeling the liquid burn, warming my chest. "Sometimes that's the best medicine." She smiled and I tried to smile back. I tucked the flask under my pillow and she smiled again. "That's one of the places I put it – especially on really bad days."

"So what happened?" I asked, looking at my folded hands. I heard her suck in a breath. "What do you remember?"  
"My boots, running, you – you were telling me something, that I didn't have the chops to make it as a pilot – "

"Anything after running?"  
"I fell?" She nodded. "Something tripped me," I said more to myself. "Then the Commander helped me up and I passed out. You caught me though, didn't you?"  
"Mhm."  
"Then I was here, with this" I gestured to my ankle.  
"Does it hurt a lot?" I nodded. "I'm sorry."  
"What?"

"I said," she paused, "I said I'm sorry, about your ankle," and she added hurriedly, "but also because I can't train you to fly. You've only got one good leg, at least for now." I felt as though someone had taken all the air out of my lungs. "You can remain a cadet on Galactica, but your life for the time being might be better spent elsewhere. Maybe go to school and get a degree? Maybe in philosophy or engineering?"

"Those are two very different topics," I said without thinking.

"Look, Cadet, uh Davis, Rebecca," my name sounded so foreign on her lips, "it's not so much a matter of not having the chops, it's a matter of timing. You passed basic training and got here, but right now? Well, with the time and therapy it's going to take to heal that ankle, maybe your time could be better spent elsewhere – they're not going to let you work in the hanger bay on crutches…" We sat in silence as it sunk in that my last days on Galactica would be spent in sick bay.

"Now what?" I asked for the second time today. I felt angry, betrayed by my body, angry at Starbuck for crushing my dreams.

"The Commander can send you back to Caprica City on a shuttle and he's willing to pull a few strings to get you into Caprican University. They've got a great faculty, though I wouldn't know that personally."

"When can I get out of here?" I asked.

"Cottle says a week, but probably a few days. Physical therapy will take a while, but you should be able to walk on it in a few weeks." More silence.

"When can I go back to Caprica?" She didn't answer. "Sir?"

"Two weeks." She stared at my ankle, almost looking through it.  
"Sir? Is everything alright?" That's when I noticed the single tear slowly streaking down her face. "Kara?" I'd never used her name before "Kara what is it?" Another tear joined the path of the first one; they fell off her chin into her hands. She sighed. "I didn't want you to get hurt. I don't want to lose any more pilots, but that's what we do – save and protect. It's impossible not to lose people, so you do what you can to prevent that, but you'll always lose people. You'd think it would get easier, but I think it gets harder." I had a feeling this wasn't about me. "That's why I'm such a bitch. Maybe if I can scare new recruits off, then the ones who aren't cut out for it will just leave or flunk out. But then there are kids like you who think that my opinion of them will change if they work harder. You worked, Becca, you worked hard and for a while I thought you'd cheated because here you were, an average kid, and suddenly your work was the same quality as the best in your class. I vowed to keep a closer watch on you. You passed the exam and I thought I'd let you have a try, then that night happened and I knew it was something besides your work ethic. I knew you'd follow orders, could do so and were willing to do so. You work to please, Becca, and with me it worked. I knew I'd make you into a top quality pilot, so I pushed you – emotionally and physically, and then this." She gestured to my ankle. "I can't keep pushing people. People around me get hurt – that's why I want you to go back to Caprica. You've proven that you'll work hard to get what you want. I don't want to hurt you again."

"Again?"  
"No, I, just promise me you'll go back to Caprica and become a scholar."  
"But Starbuck – "

"No, promise me. Promise you'll study hard and not flunk out. I don't want to see your name as a new recruit. I want you to succeed. You're not supposed to be here." What? Not supposed to be here? I was really confused. "Just promise me Becca!" She'd used my name four times now and it startled me each time.  
"Yes sir," I said.

"Yes sir what?" she sounded like she was running out of time for something.  
"I promise I'll study hard at Caprica University." She sat down, like she was suddenly tired, head in hands.

"Thank you" I heard her say. I tried to reach out to touch her, but she was too far away. My hand dropped to the bed and with the thud she looked up. Slowly she stood up, taking my hand in hers. "I'm so sorry," she whispered into my palm, kissing it gently. When I'd tried that, she'd smacked me, having just made me agree to do anything she said (and she hadn't said to do that) and now I'd just promised to go back to Caprica and become a scholar. She held my hand to her chest and I felt her heart beat flutter under my hand. She took a deep breath and leaned towards me, gently pressing her lips onto mine. They were soft and warm and felt generally lovely. I pressed my lips to hers harder, hungrily demanding her passion. She began stroking the back of my head, her other hand still holding mine clasped to her chest. Her heart continued to flutter beneath my palm. A moment later she broke the kiss, looking into my eyes and asked "Is this what you want?" I nodded. "Yes sir," I said breathlessly. While we couldn't make love in sick bay, we managed to cuddle a little. The cast on my ankle prevented me from moving much, but we made do.


	5. Chapter 5

A few days later I was allowed to leave sick bay and was given quarters nearby so Cottle could drop in when he wanted to. My belongings were removed from my former quarters and dumped unceremoniously into my new ones. Not that I'd be here for very long, but I thought it would be nice to put things away. I was wearing an air cast type boot, but I wasn't supposed to put much weight on my ankle. I had crutches too but it was hard to move my stuff and hang onto the crutches at the same time. I heard a knock on the door and frantically grabbed for a crutch expecting it to be Cottle making a house call. In doing so, I knocked a box off the table, spilling clothes across the floor. Without waiting for an answer the door opened and Lieutenant Thrace walked in. "Oh thank the gods" I muttered and stopped trying to put weight on the crutch.

"All that effort for Cottle and you get me. He'll be pleased." She grinned and looked around, her eyes settling on the overturned box. She bent to help me pick up the mess I'd made, gently folding tanks, pants and underwear and put them into the box. She came across a red, lace thong and held it up, examining it. "This is different," she said. "You were holding out on me Davis, erm Becca." I snatched the panties away, my face burning (probably matching them), and chucked them back into the box. She grinned and sat down on the bed, motioning me to join her. "How's the ankle?"

"Fine I guess."

"You seem to be hobbling well, but it wouldn't hurt to actually use the crutches or the cane." I signed. "Let's have a look." She gently put my foot in her lap and began the arduous process of taking the boot and cast off. Eventually she got enough layers of padding that she could see the bruised and swollen skin, which she gently prodded. I tensed, sucking in air through my teeth. "Oww?" she asked. I nodded, grimacing. "You don't have to be brave for me Cade-Davis, umm Becca. Sorry" she mumbled. It was my turn to smile.  
"Yes, sir, oww, sir, Lieutenant Kara Starbuck Thrace, sir."  
"Ha ha, not funny," she poked my swollen ankle again. I punched her shoulder, and then realized what I'd just done. I stared at her in horror as she burst out laughing. "Oh that face was priceless! Davis, you're no longer under my command. You're a civilian! Remember?" She tapped the side of my head, still laughing. She shook her head. "You're something else, Rebecca Davis."

"Call me Becca, okay?"

"Mhm." She'd finished taking the air cast off and looked at the swollen blob that was my ankle. "You're lucky it's just a really bad sprain! You probably did some other damage too…. Are you icing this thing?" I shook my head. She jumped up and ran out the door, coming back moments later with a bucket of ice. "Foot in now," she demanded. I slowly lifted my leg knowing how cold the ice was going to be and dipped my toes in. I pulled my foot out, glaring at Starbuck who was grinning evilly at me. "I thought I told you 'now' Cadet?"

"I thought you weren't my superior officer, sir." We glared wickedly at each other, and as I leaned in to kiss her, distracted by her magnetic pull, she pushed down on my knee forcing my foot into the ice. I gasped breaking our almost kiss, but she firmly held my leg down. "Cold!" was all I could manage to say. My brain seemed to numb with my foot.

"We'll just have to get you warmed up," and she came closer, eventually forcing me back onto the bed as she kissed me, her tongue gently poking my lips. I opened my mouth to her letting her explore, my frozen foot forgotten. Eventually we broke apart, breathing deeply laying back on the bed. "You'll thank me one day."

"For what?" I asked snuggling into the crook of her arm. "The frost bitten foot or the kiss?" I sensed that she smiled as she signed.

"Both, and for making you go back to Caprica."  
"I don't want to leave you" I said, sounding like a small child – though feeling like one around Starbuck was nothing new by this point.

"I know," she said, kissing my forehead.

We stayed snuggled on my bed for some time. She eventually dried my foot, re-wrapping it in the brace. "How's it feel?"

"Numb," I replied. She made a noncommittal noise. Over the loud speaker we heard, "Lieutenant Thrace to the CO's quarters, Lieutenant Thrace, please report to the CO's quarters." She grumbled. "Now what does he want?" I stood up with her, gingerly putting weight on my booted foot. "Davis," I turned to face her, "if you want to walk out of here, use your crutches."  
"But how am I supposed to unpack?"  
"Just do as you're told for once. For me?" And before I could reply she'd closed the hatch and left. I sat on the bed, missing her presence already, looking at the state my quarters were in.

The next week passed quickly. I'd gotten good at hopping on my left foot so I didn't put weight on the right ankle and so I could move quickly without the use of crutches. Starbuck hated that I wasn't using them, but left it alone when Doc Cottle burst out laughing from watching me. "You look like a one-legged pigeon," he'd told me. I didn't see much of Starbuck. She was busy with new recruits, I knew, but it made me a little jealous that they got to spend time with her and I didn't.

I was finally packed and ready to go. I promised myself I wouldn't cry as I left. It's not like I'd miss the space sickness, the lousy food and the communal bathrooms. I would miss the people and the camaraderie. I walked to the hanger deck one last time, duffle slung over my shoulder. Inside that duffle were Starbuck's tank and shorts – I'd given her back the flask last week, but I hadn't done laundry until yesterday. I intended to return them. I had wanted to put them with a note in her locker, but I didn't know what to say so I didn't write one. How do you tell someone that you think you're in love with them and that no matter what you'll always love them? How do you tell them this when they've essentially banished you from their life, asking that you take a different path than you'd originally chosen?

The hanger was quieter than usual. A few tools buzzed and whined but it was mostly an eerie and tense quiet. I walked down the stairs and toward the shuttle centered in the bay. I'd left the crutches with Cottle that morning, figuring that if I needed them I could get some at the University. I would be starting classes next week; Adama had called in a few favors for me and I was signed up for a few humanities classes and a basic engineering course. I was excited.

I walked/limped a little towards the shuttle when Chief Tyrol stopped me. H stuck out his hand and said, "Best of luck to you. We'll miss having you around here. You worked hard, make sure you do the same wherever else you go."

"Yes sir, I'll do that." I forced myself not to salute, but shook his hand instead.

The shuttle door opened as I got closer. I stored my bag under a seat in the back and began to sit down when I heard my name. "Cadet Rebecca Miranda Davis," _no one here knows my middle name_, I thought as I turned around. It was Commander Adama of course. I walked down the shuttle ramp and stood before him. I saluted and he did the same. "At ease Cadet," he said and I thought about the last time I'd stood in front of him and passed out. I shook the image from my mind. "Cadet Davis," he said, "today you're leaving us to go back to Caprica." Why was this so formal? I'd been hoping to leave without any pomp and circumstance. "I hope that your studies will take you far. While Galactica has been your home, I want you to know that you may return to her at any time."

"Thank you sir, I appreciate that offer," _but Starbuck would never allow it,_ I thought.

"May your future be filled with opportunities."

"So say we all," I replied, "and thank you for the opportunity to serve with you, sir." He saluted and I returned it, noting the smile that crinkled the corners of his eyes.

"Gods' speed, Becca." He said it so softly I wasn't sure I was supposed to hear it.

I turned and got back on the shuttle, noting for the first time the small crowd gathered behind Adama, Captain Adama, Tyrol, and a few of my classmates. Even Johnson was there, dressed in a flight suit having just come back from training. I smiled at him and he waved back. I put a headset on when I noticed a familiar voice. "Okay kids, buckle up and let's go." Starbuck was at the helm. I couldn't be happier to let her fly me back to Caprica, to my new life. There was no second pilot in the shuttle and I wondered what that was about. "Davis, get your ass up here. I'm not chauffeuring your sorry carcass around."

"But sir," I began unbuckling myself from the chair knowing it was pointless to argue.

"I know you can't fly, but I don't want to feel like I'm flying you around."  
"I can too fly!" I'd just never been given the chance.

"It's not like I need you to fly." Her words stung.

Maybe she was pushing me away so it wouldn't hurt as much when she left. That's what I hoped anyway. When we had left Galactica and were cruising in the direction of Caprica she asked, "What would happen if I gave your console control of the shuttle?"

"I'd say you were nuts and would pray to the gods I remembered how to fly."

"Ready?"

"What? No!"

"Oops, Cadet please take control of the shuttlecraft."  
"Starbuck!" I yelled looking at the console trying to remember what was what from my observation. "Okay, thrust, throttle, okay I can do this. I can do this," I said it over and over trying to convince myself more than anything. The shuttle dipped and then leveled out.

"Galactica actual" we heard in our earpieces, "is everything okay out there?"

"Everything's fine actual, just a training lesson."  
"Starbuck you are not authorized for a training mission on this flight." The signal crackled.

"Galactica actual, we're out of range, repeat out of range. See you on the other side."  
"Good hunting" we heard the Commander say.

"Are you trying to kill us?" I asked, heart beating wildly from fear and excitement. This was nothing like observing. I was flying the shuttle!

"Cadet, you're veering off course slightly. You might want to correct for that." I did so.

"How's that?" I asked.

"Better." We flew in silence for a while, eventually we saw Caprica looming before us. "Okay," Starbuck said, "I'm taking control back. Just relax over there till we're in the bay. If anyone asks, I flew the whole time."

"Okay." I was exhausted! How did the pilots fly so many missions back to back? I slumped down in my seat and closed my eyes. Next thing I knew I was being shaken awake. "Whaa?"

"We're here, get up." I opened my eyes and then closed them in the brilliant sunshine. "Grab your gear Davis, let's go." In a stupor I stood up and found my duffle in the back. As we exited the shuttle I noticed how busy the shuttle bay was. There were so many different kinds of ships! Different sizes too. "Keep up Davis" I quickly hobbled after her. What if I got lost? When I caught up with her I reached for her hand, for no apparent reason, but I stopped myself. "Sir" I panted slightly, "my ankle, remember? Please, slow down a bit."

"This from the girl who refused to use her crutches?" I didn't say anything but she slowed down a little.

We left the shuttle bay, turning down a few corridors and then we were standing outside. The University was at the other end of the park. As we walked, I shifted my duffle to the other shoulder, taking the opportunity to look at Starbuck. She looked somber, but her features were set to be indifferent. We walked in silence. A clock on the cathedral like University building said 11:35 – we were over an hour early. I assumed Starbuck would have dropped me at the shuttle bay and left; as if reading my mind, she said "Commander Adama wanted me to see you to the University."

"Oh," was all I said in response.

"Okay, well we're here." I couldn't stomach saying goodbye, I didn't know how too. "We're early," she said, "want to grab some lunch?" We walked to a café near the park and had sandwiches. "I forgot how bad the food on Galactica is." She grinned. We were quiet again before she said, "Look Davis, umm, Becca, I'm not very good at this sort of thing, so well," she blushed, faintly but it was still there. She fumbled through the small bag she'd carried, pulling out a small box. "Here," she said. I opened it to find two Viper shaped pins: my wings! I looked up at her not knowing what to say. "I, uh, I, I'm" I began, sounding like a dummy. "I thought you should have them before we left the ship, but you'd never flown on your own until today. Yes it was a test, but I knew you'd pass." She smiled. "Come here." I stood up and walked around the table. She took the box and pinned them in place. They were heavy on the collar of my shirt. "Their weight is supposed to remind you of all the lives you have weighing on your shoulders, literally."  
"Not that I'll ever see combat," I said.

"Never say never, Cadet." The clock bells sang out the hour. This was perfect, but I knew she'd have to leave soon. Without a second thought, I embraced her. We held onto each other tightly, not wanting to break apart. The bells chimed again, another half hour gone. "We'd better get going," she told me. I picked up my duffle and we walked up the stairs to the University, her arm over my shoulders, mine around her waist. I still had my wings pinned to my shirt. We walked into an office that said Registrar. Starbuck gave my name, emphasizing her newfound knowledge of my middle name, and was handed a packet of information. I had missed orientation so I was basically told to report to my first class tomorrow morning at 9:00am. "0900," Starbuck said, "you get to sleep in kid!" She joked, but I was somber. I didn't want her to go. "Oh cheer up, it won't be so bad. Can't be worse than having me as an instructor can it?" I embraced her again, forcing myself not to cry. "Aww," she said, sounding touched. "Oh! I almost forgot," I said dropping to the floor and fishing her tanks and shorts out of the bag. "I washed them," I said handing them to her. She laughed. "Keep them, and don't forget the fact that you were a pilot on a battlestar." She grinned. "I gotta head back now, okay?" I could tell she didn't want to leave, but I knew she had to. "Okay." This time she hugged me. "All the info you need's in here." She said handing me the folder. "Also," she scrawled something on the back of the folder, "this is my home address, so if you mail me something I might get it. Drop by if I'm in town."

"How about you drop by next time you're in the area." She winked. "Deal. I'll see you sometime Becca."

"Yeah," I said, "see ya Kara." Quickly she planted a kiss on my forehead, touched each of my new pins and said, "You promised to work hard here, see that you do."

"Yes sir," I said, and I couldn't help it, I saluted. "I'll work hard sir. I'll make you proud Kara Thrace." She smiled, meeting my salute, and then she turned on her heel and walked to the door. I stood alone still saluting in the empty hallway and whispered, "I'll make you proud, Kara Thrace, and I will never forget you." I gather up the folder and my bag and started walking towards the dorms. Tomorrow was the first day of my new life, and I wondered if I would ever meet anyone like Lieutenant Kara Thrace again, or if I'd ever see her again. I hoped I would.


End file.
